A Closeted Goth Girl Trying to Make it in the Professional World

Friday, January 27, 2017


Back in the fall of 2015, I went on a trip to Las Vegas with my husband and some friends. I am a bit late to the party with my pictures here but I figured I might as well post them anyway.  
We spent some time in the pool.....it was about 18 Celsius outside (64 F) and we thought the lifeguard was quite hilarious....the person had mittens and a headband on while we were in our bathing suits! I suppose Canadians are a bit more used to the cold than people who live further south.

We also went to see some shows. We went to see O, which was amazing, and Chris Angel Believe. The Criss Angel show was pretty bad but I love terrible things so it kind of worked for me. In the mornings, me and my husband and a friend of ours would go play low-stakes poker with the retired people which was pretty fun. I did not do very well, unfortunately! 

I also went shopping at the outlet stores and found a couple things, one of them being a cute wristlet from the Kate Spade store.


I cannot remember where I wore this or why I chose to wear pants, which I rarely do. The boots are super old, I found them hidden away in my basement. The heels have worn off on them, I might go and get them re-heeled so I can still use them.

Have you ever been to Vegas?

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Outfit Fail: Wardrobe Malfunctions

I have always enjoyed clothing, shoes, makeup, and accessories and I spend a lot of my spare time putting together outfits to express my personal style. Many people do not like to fuss with clothing or makeup as they find it to be a waste of time, but I think it is fun! Despite my level of planning, sometimes my clothes conspire to thwart me in my attempts to look half decent before I leave the house......
Today's outfit was put together to go out for a nice dinner with friends. I was excited to be wearing my new Marc By Marc Jacobs skirt that I got for a good deal at an outlet store. I paired it with a neat blazer that I found that has cute little chiffon tails. The skirt had fit me very well in the store when I tried it on; however, when I was actually walking around it it, I discovered it was slightly too big for my waist and it kept falling down a bit and exposing some skin in the midsection area which was NOT my intent for a fall outfit with a blazer over top. Thankfully we were sitting most of the time so the time I spent awkwardly pulling my skirt up every 2 seconds was minimal. On top of this, the hook and eye closure on my blazer randomly detached itself on one side during the course of the evening. ARGH!!! I tried so hard to look nice but I ended up a hot mess. Thankfully, I know how to hand sew and it was not difficult to repair the blazer and move a button a couple of inches on the skirt. 


MAC Berry Black Friday, Necklace and Cuff: Le Chateau.


Blazer: Greylin
Top, Necklace, and Cuff: Le Chateau
Skirt: Marc By Marc Jacobs
Boots: Guess

Have you ever had a wardrobe malfunction?

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

For Your Health (& An Outfit)

Last week, I read all of The Curious Professor Z's Bat Fit 2017 posts. I always find it interesting to read about other people's ideas about health and fitness. In today's world we are constantly bombarded with information about health and fitness and messages about how our bodies "should" look. Ultimately, we must all decide for ourselves how we are going to manage and prioritize our health, fitness, and appearance and there is no one right way to do this that works for everyone. Today, I am going to share some of my perspectives on health and stuff. 


In my opinion, exercise is VERY important. Unfortunately, I am a low-energy, introverted, non-athletically inclined person who HATES EXERCISE. The reason I force myself to exercise is SCIENCE. I work in health care, so I see people doing all kinds of crazy things to try to improve their health and ward off disease such as strange diets, expensive supplements, and unproven treatments and therapies. Do you know the ONE thing that is SCIENTIFICALLY proven to help prevent and improve a WIDE range of health problems? It is EXERCISING 30 minutes per day. Therefore, I make myself run on the treadmill or outside for half an hour and lift weights/do stuff on an exercise ball for half an hour 3 to 5 times per week. If I am feeling lazy, I go for a walk. It is important to find a way to exercise that works for you and your schedule. I used to go to the gym and I hated it; it was expensive, I didn't like working out with other people, I had to waste money on gym clothing to look presentable, and it took a lot of time to drive myself there. Now, I work out in my basement. I purchased a treadmill, some free weights, an exercise ball, and a weight bench. These can often be found used for the cost of  a 1 year gym membership and can be used for many years without having to keep paying membership fees. Also, I don't need to purchase any workout wear as I am in my own house and there are NO EXCUSES for not exercising as the gym is RIGHT THERE. There are endless options for getting exercise so everyone can find what works for them. Also, have you ever heard the term "use it or lose it"? I have watched many people's health and mobility deteriorate over the years due to inactivity; my exercise goal is to sustain my level of exercise over the long term to maintain my health.


Another reason why I exercise is to maintain my weight. Weight is a touchy subject for many people (especially women) and it is not hard to see why; we are constantly bombarded by images of body types that are not realistic for 90% of the population. Also, most of the images we see are photoshopped so all we see is tall, thin, women with perfect skin, no stretch marks, no wrinkles, no cellulite, etc. I think it is important to accept the fact that 90% of us are NEVER going to look like the women in the magazines and realize that there are many aspects of our appearance that we cannot control; we are all predisposed to a certain body type and you're either born with features that are whatever society says is conventionally attractive or you're not. Also, we are all going to age and we may give birth or have medical treatments that affect how our bodies look. When I was younger, I used to be a lot thinner but I remember feeling self conscious about my weight and sundry other aspects of my appearance. These days, I have decided that it is a waste of time and energy to have "body issues" and to focus on my health instead. I am not perfect looking and I am fine with that, I try to dress nicely and present myself in such a way that makes me feel good.  At my job, I see a lot of people of all different ages dealing with health problems that have a huge negative impact on their lives. I have decided to convince myself that worrying about how fat I look in a bikini is a first world problem and that I should be thankful for the fact that aside from a couple of minor things, I am healthy and can live my life unimpeded by health issues. Do I weigh myself? Yes I do. At this point in my life, I gain weight easily if I eat too much and do not exercise so keeping track of my weight helps me to know if I should be more careful about eating habits or exercising.  I have found it is helpful to have reasonable, sustainable, weight goals. Right now, I am 5'8 and 160 lbs and that is where I try to stay. I am not thin but my weight is also not to the point where it negatively affects my health; I have enough time to exercise to keep myself at this weight and I can still eat what I want within reason. Would I look better or more conventionally attractive if I decided to lose 30 lbs? Yes. However, I have decided that it is not my job or my priority to be conventionally attractive and I am not going to feel bad about myself for not conforming to societal ideals. It is not worth it to me to count every calorie I eat or exercise 7 days a week to maintain myself at that level. There is nothing wrong with prioritizing your weight or appearance if that is what works for you, but I find that it does not work for me and I don't think a person should HAVE to look a certain way or conform to beauty standards if they don't want to. 


One of the best things I did in the last several years was learn to cook and to be organized about meal planning. I used to eat many processed foods that came out of a box which is not good for you. I also learned a lot of vegetarian recipes; I have always loved vegetables but wasn't great at cooking them so this has been a good thing for me. I used to HATE cooking as well, but now I don't mind it. Another thing that I think is important about food is NOT restricting yourself too much. I LOVE to eat and I would be miserable if I was constantly counting calories or telling myself I can't have this or that. I find that it works for me to make healthy and nutritious meals most of the time while also allowing myself to have some chips or go out to eat when I feel like it. This is also why I weigh myself, it lets me know when I need to reign it in a little so I just adjust as I go along. For example, if I have been on holidays and was eating too much, then I just clean it up a bit when I get home and exercise a bit more. Another lesson that I have learned is that your weight doesn't necessarily correlate with health; when I was at my skinniest I ate chips, slurpees, and fast food all the time because I was a teenager and my metabolism was high so I could get away with it. Would I eat like that now? NO WAY. 


I think we often forget that mental health is very important as well. We must all remember to take care of ourselves in this way. Right now, I am focusing on developing constructive ways to manage stress. 

In summary, health is very important and we must all try to get to a point where we feel good about ourselves. Health is a very personal thing and we all need to find out what works for us in our lives. 

And now, an outfit.


MAC Cremesheen Glass in Jet Boy,  Necklace: The Rogue and the Wolf, Earrings: made by me, Ring: was my mother's grandmother's. 


Sweater: Simon's
Skirt: Zara
Tights: H & M


Steve Madden Wantaghh (???)

What are your thoughts about health and fitness? 

Thursday, January 5, 2017

New Year


Today's outfit is actually from this year's New Year! I have probably mentioned this before, but my posts are not necessarily contemporaneous, I often have stuff sitting around on my computer for up to a year before I post it. I had a decent holiday season this year, my days off from work happened to align with the holidays so I went to visit my family AND got to go out on New Year's Eve!

For my outfit this year, I decided to go for head to toe PVC. Please note that my corset is not fully done up in the photos; it is a heavy-duty steel-boned corset that is made to my measurements and I can REALLY cinch my waist with it. When I go out wearing one, I usually lace it up tight but not as far as it will go so I can actually sit down in the car/taxi on my way out. Then, when I get to my destination and it has "warmed up" a bit, I will cinch it ALL THE WAY. I had a long mermaid skirt with a train from Artifice Clothing in my closet that hadn't made it out yet; the train makes it a bit difficult to wear in a crowded club. I just held onto it with my clutch hand the whole night; I think I will sew a small hook on my sleeve and an eye on the train of the skirt so I don't have to hold on to it next time. I used another skirt from Artifice Clothing as a sort of bustle over the long skirt; I am glad I found another use for it as I wore it once when I bought it and it was WAY too short for me.


Clutch: Alexander Wang, Too Faced Melted Matte Lipstick in Evil Twin, Earrings: Free People, Hair Flowers: Made by my friend, Sugarpill Tiara, Sweet Pea and Fay Strangely Wearable Blush in Chromagraphic.


Shrug: Lip Service
Corset: Sweet Carousel Corsetry
Skirts: Artifice Clothing


Novice by Jeffrey Campbell
My New Year's resolution this year is to develop a Positive Mental Attitude (PMA). 

I may have posted this on here before but I'm going to post it again:

The sooner I wrap my mind around the positive attitude thing, the better!

Did you make any resolutions this year?